Dear myself,

Today I found another brokenhearted person. We, that person and I, talked about how shitty we felt, and how we became unable to do anything for a while. And yet, we smiled when we talked. It felt good. Sharing a bit of the burden did help. And it felt good that someone felt similar like what I had experienced.

Myself, you knew how it was. You knew how it was so painful. It felt like your chest was being ripped apart, your heart was pulled out, and then your heart was stabbed here and there many times, and was put back inside.

But this person did feel the same thing. This person we just met today, felt the same thing. And somehow, it felt... relieving. That there was someone out there who felt like we did. That we were not alone.

God, thank You that You allowed me to meet this person today.



PS - For someone who posted about the karma:
No, I don't believe in karma. But what I know is that a consequence exists for every action that you do. You may label it as karma, and I may label it as consequence. What I know is that God judges every action fairly.

Thank you for leaving a comment.

Dear myself,

"I wonder if there is a meaning of a failed love." - Honey & Clover

Yes. I wonder. But we already know that an event holds a certain meaning though maybe we don't know what right now. I wonder if there is a meaning of our bleeding heart. I wonder if there is a meaning of our anger and grudge.

It has been a month ever since it broke, our hearts. The first week was hellish. The thought of death was always in our mind. The thought of continuing life was unbearable. We were ultimately not functioning.

The second week was still hellish. The longing was torturing our inside. The thought of not seeing that person was very painful. But somehow, we could see that it was ending, even with all the denials.

The third week was, yes, still hellish, but we could see a glimpse of heaven. Yes, we still could not help but to miss our once-beloved-person. But we was sure, that there was no way for us to return. We could not bear another heartache.

The fourth week was... better. Finally we came at peace. Finally we could end everything. And finally we could hope again. I wish for a new love. Not right away. But we are sure that we're going to love.

The fifth week comes. We can still feel the longing. But we're at peace... It ended. We're still angry, but... we don't hate the person. I think that's good enough.

I wonder if there's a meaning of a failed love.

Honey & Clover answered: "I'm so glad that I've met you."

Me?

Yes... I'm glad that I have met you... my once-beloved-darling.

But I'm glad too... because I know I can survive without you. And because I'm stronger now. And someday, I will find someone I love and love me back.

Wait for me, my future love. I will find you.